It's Kind Of A Funny Thing...

Right now it seems all my posts are about B&B's and our anniversary. So sorry about that. But the thing is that if you know me or anything about me you know I...LOVE...THE...FALL! I love everything about it! I love the colors, the smell in the air, the festivals, the fairs, pumpkins and apple picking and above anything else in the fall that I love, I love love love Halloween! It is my favorite holiday beyond all other holidays. There is just a wonderful nostalgic, wholesome, warm and fun feeling behind the whole season. Okay so now back to how the Fall and B&B's tie in together.

In October it will be mine and John's 5 year anniversary and I wanted to go somewhere that we could celebrate this milestone. Every year we do a "Haunted House Crawl". We start out early in the evening and head to every (almost every) haunted house in the area. We have done that for the last 4 years and we will do it again this year. But I wanted to do something in addition to it all. Just this year. And then when we hit 10 years we will do something then too. So not big big every year, but every once in a while to remind us how far we have come as a couple and individuals.

Okay, so yesterday my heart was broken for the fact that we could not go to "Irish Hollow"...the most decadent place I have ever seen or hope to one day go (maybe our 10?!). But I cannot ask John to spend that much on something like that. So I went on-line looking for something less expensive, but just as memorable. Some place that did not look like a doily and an antiques roadshow had had a drunken bender at. And some place that was affordable and things to go do and was intimate (no television, no phones). Someplace that me and John could really reconnect and feel as we did when he first asked me out. Not that we are sleeping in separate rooms or any such nonsense. But just a chance for us to be really alone with one another and just...be. Simple as that.

So I'm looking and looking and wallah! I found the complete, absolute total opposite of "Irish Hollow". The only comparisons are the beautiful surroundings and well it is in a cabin. But the cabin, well safe to say it is rustic. Rustic in the fact there is no...ready for this...no 1)running water, 2) electricity and no....well aren't those two the most important!? I am not kidding you, there is no toilet, no electricity and no running water. There is an ancient (1950's) little gas stove in it for warmth(?), heating up your bath water and cooking. A fire pit outside, a privy (outhouse, cutely decorated though) nearby, a swing on the front porch, a cozy double bed loaded with quilts and a warm and cozy decor. And for 2 days in isolated bliss it's going to run us $200. That's it! I can do that...actually it is already saved up. And we might have to pick up some battery powered candles and a lantern or two. But other than that and some appropriate clothes for hiking we are set!

Just so no one worries too badly, there is a main house a short distance up the road for quests of the cabin to head up to and shower in a enclosed space with running water you do not have to carry up there yourself, so John is relieved about that. And toilets too I am assuming (safely).

Okay why you must be asking did I literally do a full 360 and go the route of the 1800's all of a sudden? Because I realized that after I got all squeamish about the outhouse, I realized John must think I "that" kind of woman. "That" kind of a woman meaning the kind that if her car broke down or the power went out for days in the middle of a snowstorm, that I would crawl up in a ball in a corner and not be able to take care of myself. That I am that helpless without someone to take care and shelter me. Nope I am determined to make him change his mind. So yes we are going the exact opposite route and it will be awesome.

Think about having to walk in the woods for firewood, cooking over a fire pit, sipping hot cider on the front porch. Dawn just breaking as we walk to the main house for a shower. We get bored we head into town or better yet...walk out the front door and go hiking or canoe out on the river. I'll take pictures and John will be so proud and happy we did this for ourselves. I mean how often does anyone get to have to pump their own water or build their own fire just in order to cook anymore. it is literally in the middle of woods so we will be surround by the colors of fall. It looks amazing, I think we would technically be in the middle of the Ozark mountains. I am really excited for this and like I said it's already paid for.

October cannot get here fast enough for me now.

A new B&B is to be found ASAP!

Yep, just yesterday my dream of staying at Irish Hollow in Galena, IL. was strong and vibrant in my mind. A celebration of our 5 year wedding anniversary just almost within reach....but then I called and found out what I thought would be $500 or so turned into....$1300.00!

I was in shock and disappointment in the fact that what was listed on the website may have changed because of October being one of their busiest times of year. So I then proceeded to eat my feelings of disappointment away. Chips, 2 cokes, a cheeseburger and a piece of french silk pie. Delicious but probably not the best thing. Why doesn't anyone exercise their feelings away by jazzercising instead?

So John, I am not sure if this was in a moment of pity, said that we could still go away for our anniversary. I would just need to find something a little less (gut wrenching) expensive. So I am on a mission tonight. I just have to straighten up the house a bit, work on some e-mails for work and then I will look a bit around on Internet to see what I can find. But I will be honest, I am still a bit down about IH. I have wanted to stay there since our 1st wedding anniversary. So it will be a little hard to let go of just yet.

The Wedding and The Abrupt Death of $50 Dollar Shoes...

The wedding was amazing. Simple and short ceremony and a bit of a break in between. Which during this I got an amazing burger and fries and my new just bought that day $50.00 dollars shoes were ruined. A piece of trash from john's car (a granola bar wrapper- sticky granola bar) got stuck on the side and left a residue of which I am not sure how to clean got on them.
I instantly got furious at john. Which I am sure was not completely warranted. Sorry hon.
I mean they were $50 bucks....now I know why I do not buy fifty dollar shoes.

But I am in pretty good spirits today. I found my lost flash drive from work under the bookcase next to my dresser. John's cat Tempe had knocked it off and under when she was playing with it. Somehow I knew she did something with it. This cat, adorable as she is, has dominated my bedroom and sometime dictates what occurs in it. Which is in itself embarrassing and really sad. But the good mood really comes from that the month of July starts in a few days which means October is getting closer and closer. And so is our 5 year wedding anniversary! Which we are celebrating by taking a few days of much needed relaxation and pampering and privacy at this great B&B in Galena, IL. I have wanted to stay in this place since our 1st wedding anniversary!! Even though I am the only one (look of miffed crossing my face right now) putting any money towards it, it has been $20 there or $50 here put aside since January). There will be a sweet sense of victory when John finds he is having a great time... Even though he has not shown any real enthusiasm yet I still think John will have a great time anyways (like I said sweet victory will be mine). Besides really when do men ever want to go to a B&B? Never, it's always done for their wives. I am not lost on this. Plus it will be just awesome to take a few days and just do exactly what we want when we want. The food is supposed to be amazing (5 star restaurant good) and the cottages in which you can stay look so beautiful and luxurious...I am so stoked. Hot cider and king beds, roaring fires and fall festivals...ahhhhh)

I was writing about a wedding wasn't I? Yikes. OK, back to point now. Haley and Tom's wedding was in a really neat glass factory and had lots to look at it when it came to items to buy that had been made there by different artists over time. But they were a definite look but not touch. It was one of the instances that if "you break you bought it" and then when you realized what you just spent on shards of glass, you would then pick up a particularly pointy one and do yourself in with it. They were that pricey. $300 for a plate or bowl....no thank you! But Tom and Haley were able to make something to commemorate the occasion which was unique and neat to watch. At first we thought they were making a bottle, then a vase and then it turned out it was a bowl. It was a pretty cool bowl (it may never get used but still a cool bowl).

The DJ was the only downside to the wedding. Did not really play anything decent till the end. He did play our wedding song though (I requested he do so) and me and John danced to that before he played more crappy music. And then finally he played something that got everyone left more or less out on the floor. Now Tom and Haley are off for 2 weeks in Hawaii and I am totally jealous, but hope they have the greatest time!

Sunday I worked for only about 5 hours, but it was hard to get up! It took us so long to get home after the wedding due to the heavy raining and storming. But we did, about 3 maybe when we went to bed. But I needed the little bit of cash to keep me tided over the next week, the rink is closed next weekend, which means a weekend off in which I did not have to sign up for, it's all mine! But that also means no cash coming in...which sucks since I wasted $50 on those damnable shoes! *Sorry Honey!*

Oh well. So I will live like a hermit week this week!

Being The "DD" of the Bachelorette Party Of Haley Sherrow...it was interesting

First things first, the party was an excellent source of great fun and great perspective as well. The party went off without a hitch, which I was so glad of. Haley is a great girl and she deserved a great time. It was me, Haley, Brittney and Jamie (her sister and best friend, which are both co-maids of honors at the wedding). So not the biggest of parties, but still fun. I think I preferred only having to wrangle 3 drunk girls instead of a whole party.

The perspective came from many sources last night. One, having to wrangle drunk girls makes me glad I mam not the hugest of drinkers. Not that any of them got out of control or got sick, it just makes me glad I am not a drinker. It is a waste of money when spent in large quantities. The second is being out and seeing people in bars is one) makes me want to loose weight to be able to have the confidence to dress a bit cuter and 2) I am soooooooo glad I am married and not out on the dating scene.

So again congrats to Haley and Tom, we are heading to their wedding tomorrow and it will be so awesome to see two more of our friends happy and with the ones they love. Plus they will be the nostalgia that comes from hearing someone else say the vows you yourself took (almost 5 years ago) as you stood in front of your family and friends. As well as the dancing and fun that will be had at the reception. So again congrats to the soon to be newlyweds and everyone else out in the world, married or not, who has found the person that makes your world go round.

A cradle list and bachelorette party

So what is a "cradle" list? Well first things first, it is not my idea, I got it from "How I Met Your Mother". I wish I did because it is a brilliant idea. It is a list of things to do before you decide to have a family. So far me and John have come up with: 1) go on a big trip just for us (which means to a place we have never been and where we don't have people to see or business to attend. A trip just for US.) 2) adopt a puppy 3) own a home....and so far that is it. I will add to my cradle list as I go on and things change. I think it is something all perspective parents should do, and even those already with one kid. I think it is still possible to do a lot of the things you wanted to accomplish or do before kids. Hell those with 12 kids should manage to do whatever it is that you need to feel fulfilled. You feel fulfilled, you would be a happier person and hence a better parent and partner to your spouse. Which is why I think we need to a few of these things before John knocks me up.

The second part of this entry is about a bachelorette party I am heading to tomorrow night. It is for my friend Haley. She is so excited to be marrying the love of her life Tom on Saturday. And we are happy to be there for it. But the bachelorette party is tomorrow night (which is an awkward night to try to plan an event it turns out). But all of her bridesmaids live out of town and so I volunteered to plan it for her (If anyone knows anything about me it is that I love to plan parties. I would plan my own baby shower one day if I could). So we are starting out with an early dinner (Eclipse), drinks (Absolutely Goosed) and ending (?) the night at the Jive and Wail (a piano bar). Who know what shenanigans we shall get up to in between it all. But I am stoked. I have bought lots of pretty things for Haley to announce she is the bride and get fawned all over with. Fawned, not manhandled. I am looking forward to it in the sense I did not have the absolute best time at my bachelorette party, even though my maid of honor Jessica tried her best and will be forever loved by all that she did for me and john during our wedding and all that lead up to it. So I will leave this person unnamed here, but half my night was spent listening to her problems about her relationship and chasing her around "Pop's" making sure she did not ruin that relationship by getting into way over her head with a stranger because she was not caring who was dragging her away into dark corners that night. I have felt that way about many events that were supposed to be mine or my night or mine and John's. So I will sure as hell protect and ensure Haley's night as best as I can. I will not be linking this to facebook just for the fact that freedom of expression is not a protected right in my family. Never has been, which is a huge shame. But again tomorrow shall be so much fun. I will be the DD and so I shall remember most of the night to be able to blog about it.

Apparently laziness did not get left in behind in my twenties...

So did I ever mention my absentee mind and resilient laziness? No. Well as you can see by my lack of blogging I am telling you the truth.

So I will play catch up with you (all the 2 people who read this) since the 15Th, I have turned 30 (I am still alive) and I woke up with a slight pang of panic but that was quickly dissolved by the receiving of birthday presents and cards. And then I spent the rest of the day by myself until I came home to John. When you have a birthday that falls in the middle of the week and you happen to have the day off, it is likely that everyone else you know is working. So I spent the day shopping and spending way too much money. I justified it by saying I was on a "Birthday High"

But I got at least 9 new things and then took out 9 old things from my closet. Out with old and in with the new. And then we went out for Indian food and to the waiting room where I pleasantly discovered you can make a shot of liquor taste like a sweet tart. Delicious!!

So I am thirty now and there is a lot that I need to do in this next year to get where I want to be in my 30's. I want to be pregnant by my 31st which means: degree, house, job and all these together equals= BABY.

I will blog about a baby way too much. John will read this and I am safely assuming panic just a bit. But I know it's not because he doesn't want to be a dad or anything like that. And I know it's not because he's afraid our lifestyle will change. It would be hard to give up our yearly visits to the riviera and my mink coat collection. But ehhh, easy peasy.
Okay back to this past week and the whole turning of the thirty thing. Saturday was my birthday party and safe to say it was the most awesome birthday I have ever had. I had a roller skating 80's themed birthday party, epic does not even begin to describe how I think it went. Some people came in costume, some did not. People mingled, visited, cut my rubix cube cake and got a Freddie Mercury poster among things for my presents. The best part though was really having my friends around. Some I have know for either or over half my life. That fact is amazing in itself.

The best costume of the night really was our friend Rob, who wore shorty shorts (he has been sworn of which to never do again) and a captain's hat. He was the generic villain from every skiing, vacation, sailing movie that was made in the 80's.

So with the dreaded 3-0 behind me the question is what to do with who I am now. I could use my turning 30 as a whole new opportunity to reinvent myself. Kind of like being forced into the witness protection program by the F.B.I. You have to move to Maine, become a librarian and are now named Sally. Nobody knows you and you can reinvent yourself as having lived a whole different life before. Interesting prospect, tempting prospect 9except the Sally name part of it). I always tell john we should run away to a city we've never been and become who we've always wanted to be before the world and all it's circumstances told us "no".
But nope, that is a no-go and we are here (not in Seattle) with the lives and names god gave us. So I am choosing to change what I can about what I can and tell the rest of it to go and suck it.

So I will end it here and try once more to promise myself I will blog everyday at least once a day.

Tomorrow is the day

So the last two nights I forgot to blog and I said I would do this everyday. I am now realizing that might be easier said than done. So I make this promise, at least three to four times a week will I keep up this blog. And the thing which makes it ridiculous is I don't think I have that much going on that I shouldn't have missed those two nights. I always say this but I never do anything about it: I have horrible time management skills.
But back to the point of this entry, I am going to be 30 tomorrow and I am now waiting for the all the texts asking if I feel "old yet" or if I need any help crossing the street. But so far nothing yet. Am slightly relieved about that.
I think the hardest part about turning 30 is that I don't really think anything (other than my marriage) about me represents someone being 30. I have never felt my age, but have never felt young. I don't look, dress or act like I'm 30...so therefore I find myself lacking the 30 "vibe".
When I was younger and I looked at the adults in my life, it seemed that when you are 30 you were supposed to have it all together. You were married, had kids, had the house and had the job. I have one of those things. I feel like my perception of who I am is not measuring up to who I thought I would be by this time.
My inner 8 year-old must be pissed off at me seriously.
But then again I think about all the things that will happen in the next 10 years and I think that makes me more worried than turning the whole 30 tomorrow. Can I become everything I need to be in the next year? Or two? Or three? I graduate in the fall and am seriously lacking any leads into my field. That worries me more than anything else. With no job leads to no house which leads to no kids (we will have kids, it's just that I want to give them such an excellent start).
At least that is my way of thinking and I know I am over thinking it all, but fear is one of the strongest emotions out there for a reason.

Sunday and breakfast for dinner

So this blog was totally given away from the title. It's Sunday and we had breakfast for dinner. It was yummy and John outdid himself with it. Plus he helped clean up the kitchen afterwards! Double bonus points! See the thing is John is a great provider and would do anything for our family. But cleanup...especially to my standards is sometimes lacking.
But now I don't have to worry about it in the morning and we also went grocery shopping after the rink today so the house is more or less ready for the week.
I have read that Sunday is the best day to do all your errands and household chores because then your family can start the week off fresh and ready for whatever the world wants to toss at you.
So this week I turn 30. T-Minus 4 days....will I panic, cry, or totally be okay and feel the fool for it all? I am not sure. I am thinking the last option will be the one I go for.
I told Nicole (the friend I nanny for) she might come home on Thursday to find me crying on the floor of her living room holding Eli and rocking back and forth. I have said this to get a laugh or two, but will some part of it actually happen? Will I look at that gloriously cute little boy and see the children we don't have yet? Maybe.
But I have said to John this is the year of children for us. I want it to be. I have been hoping as I look as the time between my 30th and my 31st as the deadline for us having a child or me being pregnant at least.
Here's hoping.

Ewwwies, jammies and boredom.

Oh what a longedy long long day....about 3:00ish all the parties at work were done coming in and no one was choosing songs I hadn't already played a 1000 times already that day, so they had to suffer through my Ipod playlist. Which I thought was awesome and like I mentioned in previous sentence they thought was lame. Screw em, my music is timeless (is 80's timeless?). But man did the day drag and I knew I was coming home to an empty house so that made it even worse.
John is at a bachelor party and I am hardly worried, it was paint ball and a pub crawl later. I heard the paintball was awesome and not as painful as John thought it might be and as some of our friends have said in the past. They are apparently are pussies. And I promised to kiss all of John's bruises and welts when he gets home. He just better not drive (which he would never) drunk or buzzed. I have threatened to kick his ass and then call his mom and let her kick his ass. Which I never have had to do and will definitely do if need be.
So here I am after a regrettable dinner of White castle cheeseburger and fries. I blew my calorie content by almost a 1000 calories. I feel all ewwwwie. I think that is a word. If not I declare it to be a word. And I feel all ewwwwie and now know I could have done something a lot lighter and different for dinner or at least had not as many burgers. Maybe just 2 instead of 5.
Yes I had 5...I love me some white castles.
So now I am blogging and sitting in my jammies and thinking I could have headed out. Done something even on my own. But it is too late to go anywhere and window shop as well as my brakes are squeaking like I am torturing small mammals under my hood. I feel like I am getting looks as I drive along like people are thinking I am some poor and idiot teenager who is too stupid to realize she needs her brake pads changed. Because I use to give looks like that. And now I feel shamed. Because it's not that I am poor or stupid. My mechanic is closed on the weekends and I am dropping the car off Monday.
So here I am in the bedroom, the "Closer" on t.v. and Tempe (John's cat) attacking my computer cord. And I am at a loss of what to do. I know there is laundry that can be done or cleaning to be done. but neh....nope. Decided against it but am wishing we had extended cable upstairs. So I shall just continue to sit here and feel lame and ewwwwie.
And so it begins. Or continues. Whatever.

Turning 30...So I am Going to Blog

So it is less than a week away from my being 30 and I thought I would be able to handle it. But like many other woman approaching 30 I was so foolish. Foolish indeed. I am looking at myself as too heavy, too unaccomplished and childless.
But as I also calm down and take a minute to look around, I realize I have a great life. I am one semester away from having my bachelor's degree, I am working at a media company (it is small and I'm not sure I will stay at it forever) and I am also a nanny for an adorable little boy (Eli). And I have a beyond amazing husband (John) that I will be celebrating our 5th wedding anniversary with in October.
With all of these thoughts running through my head, I have to wonder why is there such a pressure for young(er) woman to feel like they have to have it all by the age of 30? Why the pressure to attain or feel like less of a woman or a contributing successful human being?
This next decade of my life is due to be great, no matter how I look at it. Me and John are looking for our first house right now, in the next year I plan on having my bachelor's degree and after that will open the door for children for us. Awesome. I know we are going to have gorgeous babies. Thick full headed haired babies. It makes me smile just thinking of it. And with the degree I will always be able to hold my head up high.
So with this blog will write about the house hunt (and the fighting that will follow), the last semester of school (and the crying and mass amounts of coffee that will follow) and definately my craziness for a baby ( and all the *insert emotion/verb* here). I would love if this blog became a big deal in the bloggisphere, but really maybe just an outlet if nothing else.
And I promise I will deter from above said topics to post on the mundane, the awesome and random. But that is more or less what comes out of my mouth on a daily basis so no harm/no foul.